


Neverland's Secrets

by ThisCrazyFan



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV), Peter Pan & Related Fandoms
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, One Shot, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-27
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:15:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 31
Words: 15,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27225661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThisCrazyFan/pseuds/ThisCrazyFan
Summary: Dark one- shots collection about Peter and Wendy. Some are inspired by ouat season 3, but you could understand even if you didn't watched the show. Also publish on tumblr.
Relationships: Wendy Darling/Peter Pan (Peter Pan), Wendy Darling/Peter Pan | Malcolm
Comments: 4
Kudos: 59





	1. When She Wakes up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've decided to publish my one- shots both here and in tumblr. Years I didn't ship this couple and than "Dark Paradise " by LadyKikyo1792 was update (go check this out! This is one of the best fanfics I've ever read!)

She can’t forget you. She wish she could. 

You are always there- in her nightmare, in her mind, in her heart. Was this your plan all along? What are you earning from causing her this pain?

Sometimes she want to see you one more time. If only to yell at you for the memories you gave her.


	2. The Trees Can Catch You

Wendy learnd (in the hard way) that all trees have a mind.

She thought in the first time that she had tried to escape that she just need to wait until she’ll be alone. The losts kids can’t hang around her forever. While they all like her (well, most of them), they have so many other things to do. They have games to play, tresures to find, pirates to fight against, indians to kill. 

When they leave her alone in the camp (and he is gone, god knows where), she doesn’t waste any time. “I’m coming home”, she thought, and this thought is happy enough to make her fly. Her feets leave the ground and warm joy fills her heart. 

She is raising high, higher then she ever fly when she was alone. After years being traped in neverland she had learned (she had been forced to learn) how to fly in the the direction she wanted, how to keep the thought gathered. (She was so good at flying that he started to call her bird).

Her body is so high, and Wendy could see the last branch. This is it. after this branch there will be nothing but clear skies. It makes her fly even faster. (She is always so close and yet so, so far).

She tried to fly off when one of the branches wrapped arround her ankle. Bad luck? Her feet kicked in the air in effort to break free, when another branch is wrapped around her hand. Panic spread in her guts.

She cries (quietly, she already learned that it’s best for her to cry quietly) when she understand that she is trapped. The more she tries to break free, the more the trees tight their grab on her. If she’ll yell for help she might get back to her cage. 

Her head spin when she hears a sound coming down. Her heart sink. If any lost boy would find her there, he might cut her throat. They might like her, but they adore him. She tense up, didn’t dare to breath.

It’s not a lost boy. It’s worst. 

He fly up to her, his terrible smile promised no good. “And where do you think you’re going, Wendy-bird?”


	3. Tell Me a Story

At the first nights she didn’t cared that they asks her a story every night. She used to like telling stories. She told her brothers stories every night back at home. (Did she told them every night though? She could no longer remember).

When the darkness is coming and the fire is burning, she is telling them every story she can remember. There is not a single lost boy who look away from her when she is talking. Even Felix- who’s glaring towards her every other hour at the day- is staring at her intensely when she speaks. 

(There is something so hungry in their faces when she speaks)

Their leader is encourage them to play the story. He likes to pretend that he is the handsome prince and someone else is the monster. When the story reached its climax he likes to sweep her up and pretend that she is the princess he just saved. (It’s the only time he acts romantically towards her. Even though every lost boy knows she is belong to him).

When she run out of stories they still begs her to tell them. 

(No, not begging. Demanding).

To think about new stories starts to gets a harder and harder task (Duty).

They look so happy during the day. They play for hours. They having for so many adventures. Wicked, wicked children who never cries, who laugh at anyone who’s weaker than them. And their leader is the ruthless of all.

(That is why it takes her so long to understand that they want her to tell them stories so they forget that they were prisoners of neverland).


	4. How’s London Those Days?

Only in her dreams she can see London. If she says out loud in daylight that she misses home, Pan get’s angry and threaten to drawn her in the lagoon. 

Behind close eyes she lets herself think about her beloved city. She can see the candy shop her parents had taken her and her brothers to every weekend. She can feel the fog on her face. Unlike the green Neverland, her home is grey and rainy. familiar.

She knows that it’s been so long since she was in London, and the city itself must have changed. She hopes that her school closed, but if it didn’t she didn’t mind to go back there. And what flowers blooming now on Kingston garden? 

She knows Pan (not Peter, not anymore) came as well from London. He told her this once, when he was in a really good mood. He never asks her about the city.

She wish she could ask one of the new lost boys if they came from her city, and what have changed there.


	5. What the Fairy Know

Tinkerbell was maybe a small creäture, but it didn't mean she had a small brain at all. In fact, Tinkerbell might have dared to call herself a herself fairy with a very big brain.

She knew that when the pirates are around there are talks about revenge. She also knew that none of them would dare to act directly against any of the lost boys, no matter how many limbs had they lost. No one was stupid enough to act impulsively. When two pirates swear on the deck that one day they'll cut all of those "bloody kids" away she stayed silent. It's just words.

She also was a wise enough fairy to know that when the fairies are all leaving Neverland, it's not just because the winter is coming. "It's getting cold in here," says every fairy that leaves. "I've decided to find somewhere warm." She knows that to talk about the fairies that are now gone a death sentence. And that not all of them successfully found their warm place.

Tinkerbell also knows that if you value your life, you should never come across the lost boys while they go haunting. When they hold their bows and daggers they only think about killing. They don't mind if you are a bear, fairy, a deer or indian. When they in the mood, all that they want is to kill.

Yes, Tinkerbell was pretty smart fairy. Which is why she gets along with Pan. She know that she should never tells Pan that he is wrong, that she should let give what he demand from her without argue, never draw his attention, to never trust his smile, and if she should lie to the other fairies so she could get him pixie dust, she should. Tinkerbell knows that he might look like a boy, but he is a bloody demon.

But Wendy, apparently, was a big girl with a really tiny brain. She always says things that angers Pan. She keeps telling Pan that she wants to go home, despite the fact that Pan always hates talking about home. She likes to cry, and make the lost boys sad. She might think that it will make Pan bored or furies at her. Maybe she thinks that if she'll do all the wrong things, Pan will send her home.

Tinkerbell knows better than that. As angry as he gets at her, Pan likes having a girl in the island. He likes that the lost boys have some sort of "mother". He love the stories she tells them every night. He likes the smell of her hair and he likes the little kiss in the right corner of her mouth. As much as she gets on his nerves, the more she is fascinating him more. Wendy is a wrecking ball of emotions, a gas for Pan's flame. And he loves it.

Tinkerbell knows better than Wendy. Pan would never let her go.


	6. What Are We?

She can't understand Pan. True, she know him ever since she was twelve, and yet with every year that past he was less and less predicted.

He was the bad boy of high school, half of his class he skipped to do god knows what in the forest outside of the town. His friends the lost boys, as they called themselves admired him as if he was a movie star. She thought he dated Tinkerbell last year until she walked into class one day wrapped around one of his friends.

Wendy didn't hated him. Not at all. She just didn't knew what he thought about her. In some days he was really nice to her, acted as if she was a royal lady and even kissed her hands. At other days he teased her, and even though he kept it light he still knew exactly what words to say to make her emotional. She tried to be his friend, he didn't seem to like it. She was upset on him, he was nice and asked her what was wrong and if he can help.

Everyone in school knew about their weird interaction. If Pan said a really nasty comment to her in the school bus, the cheerleaders texted her less than an hour later about it. If Pan ruined her art project, the chess club required to help her fix it. They were not exactly on her side, or on his side. They were more like a fans, that enjoyed their favorite soap opera.

Well, all but Neal.

In the last year of high school he asked her out. The poor boy struggle to find the right words. Wendy was very flattered by him.

They keep their relationship as a secret. Not on purpose. They are just two private people. How did Pan found out about it? She have no idea.

It all goes well for a few months, until she finds out that Neal was still dating Emma. She says nothing for the next days and no one notice that she is slightly off. All but Pan, that surprisingly leave her alone.

Five days after they break up, Neal comes to school with a broken nose. He avoids meeting Pan's or Wendy's eyes all day and stay away from Emma.

Wendy didn't ask them, and still Slightly and Nibs hints her that they had something to do with it. And if they had something to do with it, than Pan surely involved.

On the ride back on the bus, Pan take the seat next to her. He let himself put his hand around her shoulder and close her to him. She tense, until it's clear that he is not there to tease her. He humming into her ear and whisper her quietly that she worth a lot more than Neal.

She remain silent, although his words are comforting her. It feels so nice to sit next to him, to smell the smell of woods that comes from his shirt. Something had changed between them for the better. They don't have to give it a name just yet.


	7. Isolated

She found out too quickly that she shouldn't talk with another lost boy when she was alone. Their leader hates it when she does.

The first time she was alone with a lost boy (Rufio, oh, Rufio!) she thought it could do no harm. Her lips made the brightest smile she could give, with soft warm voice she asked him questions about himself. The boy, bless his soul, was a poor boy who for years been starved for affection from his mother. He couldn't resist to the pretty girl who gave him her full attention.

She had no idea if one of the lost boy told him or if it was the trees, or perhaps it was just her laughter. Soon enough Pan is back to the camp. He stood there silent for a few seconds and just string at her lips.

(Because she was laughing too hard, and someone have heard it, and she was never laughing when Pan was around).

Before anyone can say a word he drags her into the woods. Her cries and kick not helping. He just lift her up as if she was weightless and fly up to the top of the trees (to the one tree she knew all too well).

He put her back in her cage, lock the door as if she could fly away if she wanted to. (His eyes so shiny every time he shove her back into that cage, she can't ignore how much pleasure it gives this sick boy). "You made a mistake, bird."

She yell at him when he goes down, her screams changes from empty threats to cries and back. He ignore those.

When he finally lets her out after a few hours (days?) she can't see a certain boy around the fire. She asks Slightly, "where is Rufio?"

Slightly avoid her eyes. And Wendy learned her lesson.


	8. This Place Between Sleep and Awake

The only time she can say that this monster can be truly kind to her, is after the darkness comes. When she lay on her back in the camp full with boys who cry themselves to sleep, and when the hour for games was over and everyone's imagination was run out.

She was always the last one of them to fall back to sleep because the others starts to cry the second the night falls. Her body is itching to come and hug them to sleep, her tired mind knows that if she do they might be ashamed for doing so. Or worse their leader might find out about it, and he would not be happy at all. So she close her eyes and tries to ignore the cries, not matter how heart breaking it is for her.

She wants to fall asleep so badly. Her mind is so blurry and her head is heavy. And how could she ignore the crying boys? Her cheat is so hurt from hearing them. She is split.

And than, when her mind is blurry and she is half asleep half awake, she feels strong arms wrapped around her. If she was ever awake enough to notice it, she would have said that those arms never hugged her like this on daylight. She would have thought that he might never touched her like this put of fear she'll reject him.

This touch is all that she needs to fall asleep. And even than, unaware, she could never escape her nightmares. Dreams about shadows and pirates and a mother that calls her to come back.

She has no idea that the devilish boy would stay awake all night to wipe out those traitors nightmares. She can never know that hearing her crying is what breaks him more than everything.


	9. If I were a boy...

Wendy wish she could go to haunt with the other lost boys. She was fair enough with the crossbow, and she once caught a squirrel in the camp. She insisted to cook it, and the other lost boys pretended it tasted good.

She also wish she could she could fight against the pirates. As a girl, in the few battles she fought against them, they insisted not to harm her. And even if she wanted, Wendy knew that she can't give them more than flash wounds. Her heart could not take it if she'll be in charged in any way on their death. Still, when she sees the lost boys comes back after their fights with purple marks on their bodies and smile on their faces, she thinks this could be fun to swing a sword over a pirate.

One of the first things that Wendy wanted to do when she got to Neverland was to see the mermaids. She have heard so many stories about their incredible beauty, and the voices that hook into your soul. The others in Neverland sees them all the times. Some boys likes them so much, that they never return to the shore.

But Wendy was not like the other boys. Wendy Darling was a girl. And Peter Pan never let her to do any of those things. Pan had told her to always stay around camp, and only practice her fight skills when another lost boy was arround. Pan kept her as far as possible from the water, and limited any of her interactions with the other population in Neverland. Pan refuse to let her get out and do what the other boys did.

Pan didn't want Wendy to play any boys games. He had other games to play with her in his mind. Games that boy and girl could play alone, games that he didn't wanted any other lost boy would play with her.

Sometimes Wendy dreams that she was a boy, if only so Pan won't play with her those games.


	10. Affections Can Give Scars

He tried very hard to stay still. It was almost impossible task when a dagger cuts you from your right eyebrow to your cheek.

All the lost boys stand around in silent, not daring to say anything to draw their leader's attention back to them. They had seen him in so many moods, different levels of anger and rage. None as furies as he was now.

His expression was dark, and the light from the fire made his face look satanic. The only girl in his camp stood as far as she could from him and looked at the shadows on his face with worry. She shook. Only a few seconds ago she and Felix sat next to the fire and spoke quietly on dinner. She didn't show him any more affection than she gave the other lost boys, or laugh from his joke or showed in any way she liked him more.

And than he mention chocolate cakes, and she smiled.

Now Pan drag him from her, not too far though. He wanted her to see it. He wanted them all to see that.

"Felix", said Pan with a low hard voice. "We had already talked about this, heave we not?"

He did told them that. Told them to stay away from Wendy bird. Felix was one of the loyalest lost boys, no one had thought he would get too close to Wendy.

The lost boy held back any signs of pain.

Pan continued, not waiting for an answer, "Wendy-bird’s heart is too big. She gives her love too easy. You should not use her naïvety."

No one can, but him.

Wendy kept quiet, though it physically hurt her to watch. She wants to beg the lost boy to forgive her, to say she is sorry. He avoids looking at her, and she understand why.

When Pan finally removes the dagger, he turns away from the punished boy as if nothing happen. No one can say anything, it will only make Pan upset. He sits next to Wendy and eats his food, and the bird look down at her feet and tries hard not to cry.

From that day forward she tried not to smile to the other boys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He tried very hard to stay still. It was almost impossible task when a dagger cuts you from your right eyebrow to your cheek.
> 
> All the lost boys stand around in silent, not daring to say anything to draw their leader's attention back to them. They had seen him in so many moods, different levels of anger and rage. None as furies as he was now.
> 
> His expression was dark, and the light from the fire made his face look satanic. The only girl in his camp stood as far as she could from him and looked at the shadows on his face with worry. She shook. Only a few seconds ago she and Felix sat next to the fire and spoke quietly on dinner. She didn't show him any more affection than she gave the other lost boys, or laugh from his joke or showed in any way she liked him more.
> 
> And than he mention chocolate cakes, and she smiled.
> 
> Now Pan drag him from her, not too far though. He wanted her to see it. He wanted them all to see that.
> 
> "Felix", said Pan with a low hard voice. "We had already talked about this, heave we not?"
> 
> He did told them that. Told them to stay away from Wendy bird. Felix was one of the loyalest lost boys, no one had thought he would get too close to Wendy.
> 
> The lost boy held back any signs of pain.
> 
> Pan continued, not waiting for an answer, "Wendy-bird’s heart is too big. She gives her love too easy. You should not use her naïvety."
> 
> No one can, but him.
> 
> Wendy kept quiet, though it physically hurt her to watch. She wants to beg the lost boy to forgive her, to say she is sorry. He avoids looking at her, and she understand why.
> 
> When Pan finally removes the dagger, he turns away from the punished boy as if nothing happen. No one can say anything, it will only make Pan upset. He sits next to Wendy and eats his food, and the bird look down at her feet and tries hard not to cry.
> 
> From that day forward she tried not to smile to the other boys.


	11. Things She Can’t Have #1

When Pan understand what she just said, he burst into laughter.

She scowl at him. "What?"

"Really? Out of all things, that is what you want?"

Well, Wendy had to agree: this was probably not the most desirable thing in Neverland. The lost boys and the pirates dreamed about fights, the mermaid dreamed on shining stuff, the fairies dreamed on swimming without ruin their wings and so own.

Wendy's little wish was unusual. Still, she was sure it understandable.

Not in his eyes, at least.

Pan smirked. She caught him in a really good mood, and it seemed like her request put him in a better mood. He shook his head. "Neverland is not a place for girls. Better get it out of your mind."

"I'm a girl, Tink is a girl. Tiger Lily-”

"A fairy and an indian doesn't count. And you are a mother, so it's exception." He quickly adds, "there could be only one mother on the island."

True, she is the mother. As much as she hated to admit it, Wendy already accepted her rule in Neverland. She come to terms with the fact that she would never leave, that she would always have to take care of the lost boys. Still, if she must act like a mother, why can't she be a mother for a girl?

She frowned at him. She expected that from him. She just didn't think it would be so hurt. She bitten her lower lip in effort to hold herself from look more disappointed.

Pan shrugged. "Why you even want a girl anyway? You have the lost boys, Tink and me."

She tries to explain it for him, "and you are all wonderful, but the lost boys are not lost girls and the fairies are not human. Human girls act... differently."

"You have Tootles. He is girly enough."

"No boy is like a girl. One girl equals more than twenty boys."

The corners of his lips tight. She knows she walks on a tight rope, and should not to add something that might cause him to snap. "Than I'll get you twenty-one boys. Another girl won't set her foot on the island."

Her face fallen down. As always, he had the last word. How could a boy understand why a girl want to be a mother for a girl for once? How could a boy understand what bound girls have with their mothers?


	12. There Is No Reason to Scared Anymore

"Oh", that is her first reaction. Than, "are you sure?"

From the other side of the line she hears Tinkerbell swallow. She thinks that her best friend want to tell her that she was, though both Wendy and Tink knew that with Peter Pan nothing was sure. Her voice shook when she said, "well, that's what the doctors say."

Wendy looks from her seat on the sofa over the kitchen. John and Michael are eating dinner. When they look over her she is trying to smile, and not show that she was struggle to breath again.

None of the girls asks the other how is she, because they both knows that the answer will be too complicated.

None of them dared to ask if the other os going to the funeral, to deal with the lost boys and the well- known bloody pirate.

Wendy asks, "has he suffered a lot?". Despite everything he had her been through, she didn't want to know that Pan was suffer. Her heart could simply not take this.

Tink say, "not as much as he deserved." There is no real revengeful in Tink's voice, it was just a fact.

Wendy nodes, than remembers that Tink can't see her. "So what now?"

"Now? Now you'll go to high school, I'll spend my time getting drank, and life will go on."

When the call is over she still thinking about it, about him. So the demonic bastard found out that he was mortal after all. Oh, how she would have loved to rub it on his face if she could.

"Life will go on."

She tries to picture him dead. With her eyes shut close she could still see his hair shinning in the light of the pixie dust, the childish smile he always had. He was always so gracefully like a bird, youthful and self-assured like a king. It was impossible to imagine him dead.

"Life will go on."

Tink's words kept ring in her ears. When John notice her face , she signs him 'later' and turn over the big window. Outside in the garden she can see her new dog napping under a tree, alight from moonlight, dreaming on bones.

She liked her new life. While it was hard to adjust, it was worth it. No more running in the jungle. The only trees that she could see were behind fences. So many new objects that make her life easier. She had a real home now, not a treehouse. 

Tink is right. After all, she thought that her life was over, and look at She liked her new home, the home she and what's left from her family got after the adventures in Neverland.

She thought back than that Pan might adopt to life in this world. After all, wasn't he the boy who always ruled everyone? Was he not the most feared and admired boy in Neverland? If Nibs can do it, Wendy knew Pan can too.

It was weird not to fear Pan anymore. Not to close her eyes knowing he was out there, planning no- good. There is a part in her that is thriving now that she doesn't have to fear that he'll push her off cliff to encourage her fly, her threaten to drawn her in the lagoon. Not to mention how much better she felt knowing she would no longer have to spend time locked in a cage.

Alas, there is another part in her. A part that still thinking about the beloved boy who had promised her to never grow old, to fly in the sky. A part that was still effected by the boy who had the most amazing smile she had ever seen.

Her fingers tight on her phone. Yes, life will go on. She just no longer have to live her life in his shadow. She would never again be deluded by his empty promises. She'll lives her life without Peter Pan, and she'll find happines once more. One day.


	13. Her Shadow

Pretty early she realize that she is never alone. There might be no living person around her, and still she feels eyes on her back all day. This feeling never let go of her. It makes her paranoid.

Her mind wonders, how to make it stop? She can't think of any answer. You can't make something disappear. Not unless you know exactly what you looking after. In Neverland, the island of pure imagination, it could be everything.

She never tells it to the lost boys. The last thing she wanted to look in those cruel creatures eyes is vulnerable. Instead she keeps her emotions lock inside, driving her insane slowly.

She jumps from the slightest noise, always look around her shoulder. There is always a glimpse of sight that she caught, and it always gone second later. This sort of things she never had to deal with when she was with her family in London.

Tink notice one day and asks her what happened. Wendy smiles and pretend that she has no idea what the fairy meant by it.

"I sneezed and you almost fainted."

"Well- may you excuse me, you just sneeze awfully loudly."

Tink tried again, but the young lady avoid her question. She consider Tink as her only friend in this island for abandon boys, and when the fairy was around all that Wendy wanted to talk with her about were happy stuff.

It's still scares her. Those emotions not letting her go. At some point she even scared from her own heart beating.

Pan notice eventually. Of course he did. When their little chase game is over and he pulled her by her hair to drag her back to the camp, he asks her- his tone is flat, as if he couldn't care less- why does she always look like she was about to snap.

She can't lie to him. No one can lie to him and get out of it. "Someone is watching at me even when I'm alone."

He stops walking, and Wendy take this opportunity to free her hair from his grip. His expression is not as amuse as she thought it will be. He is actually more tense. "Are you sure?"

"No. I mean yes. Well... I could be wrong."

"Darling, are you sure or not? It's not a complicated question."

She brush her sweaty palms on the sides of her nightgown. "There is a shadow. If I look fast enough I can see it."

Pan take in this knowledge. He says nothing, and much to her delight he let her walk two steps before him all the way back.

When the pale sun shine in the middle of the dark skies he pulls her out of her cage and let her stretch out. He lets her a few minutes to adjust before his low patient runs out and he takes her hand in his. "Come with me."

He takes her to his tree. The tree where he stays when he wants to be alone. Pan helps her climb up to the top and gesture for her to look down. "Watch."

Wendy looks down, and gasps. On the land it is her shadow, yet it's not like the shadow she had in London. It's much more expressive, it looks back to her, and even without facial expressions or features she knows this black figure is alive.

Pan looks pleased. He touch her gently. His own shadow touching Wendy's shadow as well. "She came to life faster than I thought. Isn't it nice, Wendy- bird? It's like always have a friend by your side."

She covers her mouth with her hand. He kissing gently her temple, just like she had taught him to do. Her lower lip shake. "How?"

"You don't like it? I can take your shadow away, if you want."

She knows instantly that her shadow is afraid of it, of what Pan might do to it. "Please don't," she adds quickly.

He smirks at her. There where times she believed that his smile was childish and full of boyhood excitement, those days are long gone. "I knew you'll like her once you two come face to face."

She knows already that it is a really bad idea to show Pan when things are creeping her out. He might enjoy her fear at use it for his own purpose, or worse- to kill and destroy the things that horrified her. So she pretend that she is alright, and he is satisfying because he thinks that once again he succeeded to impress her. She is not telling him that now she is more sacred than before. A pirate, an indian, a fairy or even another lost boy could be killed, the very least to get expelled. But how can anyone get rid of its own shadow?


	14. Her Magic

No lost boy had ever dared to say it out loud. Not when they had no idea how their leader would react. It was just one of those secrets everyone knew and never spoke about. Neverland was full of those.

But they all knew that lady- mother- Wendy- Darling- Bird had magic.

Well, they didn't knew it at first, of course. She had never told them or boast she can, unlike most magical creatures here in Neverland. The young woman who came all the way from London was too polite for a magical creäture.  
They had only started to notice that when she brushed their hair back, and they all felt something warm in their chest. If Pan ever noticed the sights they give each other when she touched their hair, he never said so. They all knew it was there. There was something enchanting in her touch.

They also noticed it after the fifth or sixth time that she had told them a story. It wasn't that good of a story. It was a boring story about a girl who enslaved by her step mom and got married with handsome prince. Nonetheless, no lost could look away from her lips when she spoke. It was like she cast a spell on them.

And when Wendy Darling kissed their cuts... well, this information they surely could not tell Pan. She only ever done it when he was far on the other side of the island, and always farther her lips quick enough. It didn't weaken the effect. Amazing how a simple kiss can cure everything.

The lost boys all knew that Wendy Darling had magic. And it was not the most terrifying thing. The most terrifying thing was how she put some sort of curse on the great and mighty Peter Pan himself.

She couldn't tell them that, of course. Boasting that you have won in a battle against Pan could only get you into troubles. They only knew it because of the weird way he acted when she was around. So much more calm, more gathered and serious. He let them cry in their sleep when she slept in the camp, and when she was present he didn't even mention killing anyone. Even Felix and Rufio can't deny that there is something there.

Of course, they can never ask her about it.


	15. Pack it, box it, flip it, top it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fanfic inspired on the song “The Bakery” by Melanie Martinez

Wendy smiled. Ruby was right: humming the actions to herself really did make this part of the job easier.

The Bakery of Granny was famous around town for their high standards. They always insisted on good eyes and wide smile while you work. Ruby (or Red, as some of her very closed friends called her) promised her grandmother that Wendy will be a very welcomed addition to their family business. Granny, who knew Wendy for years now, didn't needed too many convincing to agree.

Wendy was glad. She didn't really enjoy working there. All those rainbow cookies and pies that fly through the roofs were a nightmare to make. Still, what did it mattered if the money was good? And at least Ruby was there with her.

The bell rang above, and Wendy put on her best smile. She didn't let it slips even when she noticed who was the client. "Hello Pan, what can I get you?"

Peter Pan. The notorious boy in town. Once the sheriff caught him trying to set the Cameron in the cemetery on fire. Now in the last year of high school he was in the sweet spot between when he still had boyhood charm and a charisma.

Despite being in his class, Wendy succeeded never been spotted by him. Well, that is until she got into the bakery. Almost from her first week he started visit the place daily. He always spent hours there and bought only a cookie that is if he bought something at all. He wanted more to annoy her while she worked.

Six months more, and you can buy this ticket to London. She repeated it in her mind over and over in her head and forced herself to stay sweet.

Pan brushed his fingers on the glass cover of the muffins. There was something in his eyes, something that she didn't like at all. "Sweet as always, little bird."

He always had nicknames for everyone. To their teacher he called "Hook," to his friends he called "Lost boys," and to his only female friend he called "fairy." She didn't feel a tingle in her chest when he called her bird. Not at all.

He pointed on all those sweets and asked, "what are you recommending me?"

Why are you bother? You won't even buy it in the end. She said, "our rainbow cookies are fantastic."

"You saying it because you made them?"

"It doesn't matter who makes it. Those are really good cookies."

He lowered slightly front, and she was thankful that there was a counter between them. "There is a different between the food I make to the food others make. Why won't you show me the recipe? We can have a bake off."

And there it is again. She politely refused, and Pan kept pushing again gently. He use all his youthful charm and self a sure. Wendy thought he always offered her those just to get the secrets of the bakery, until she talked with Ruby about it. Her friends eyes opened wide. "Don't you know? He likes you."

She didn't really believed Ruby. Pan never likes anyone. Pan can't like anyone. He was a childish boy who always did what brings him happy at that moment, always wanted to prove he was the best. A creäture like this could only want, and want only the best.

She kept telling that to herself when he played with a curl of her hair. While she cleaned up the place, he kept talking about how he should show her one day how great he is in cooking and baking, and how she had never tasted cookies like his. She mostly nod and let him talk. 

It wasn’t like he bothered her too much. And the demand were after all to act kindly to every costumer. She even knew that if she’ll tell Granny the sweet saint won’t let her stay there alone. But she also knew that if she’ll make a big deal out of this, Pan would take it as if there is something between them.

When it was ten minutes before closing, Pan flashed her a smile before leaving the place. "I'll be back tomorrow."

She watched him going. A feeling of pity filled Wendy inside. For him there is never a long-term plans. He expected her to stay there forever. Even sweet granny knew that she should go one day. London was waiting for her.

Pan should understand it. She can't stay around with a guy like him in this town. And not matter how many cookies he can bake her.


	16. Jane

Her treehouse filled with her screams. Surrey everyone in Neverland could hear her. Why was it so hot in there? If only she could remove her night-gown all the way down. Felix, who stood at the enter of the room and judged the scene probably won't do it, and Tink, who knelt at the edge of the bed and next to Wendy's legs raised up her skirt and won't do more than that.

Sweat cover up Wendy's skin. She felt like her body was about to explode. Part of her kept asking how she got to this situation. The world kept spinning around. She grasped the sheets of her bed and kept breath in and breath out, by Tink's guidance.

"Just one more time!"

She screamed, her body did what her pure instinct told her to do. Now there was another scream in the room, this time higher. She looked down to the fairy between her legs, and saw the little mess that she held. Wendy did it.

Tink used a wet cloth to clean the little face. "It's a girl."

Wendy tried to pull herself to sit up. Her voice was weak and broken when she asked, "a girl?"

Tink nodded.

"Let me hold her."

She reached her hands up when Felix entered the room. His expression dark. "What are you doing? Give me her."

Wendy reached her hands out, and so did Felix. Unwillingly, Tink had to give the baby to the lost boy. "Carefull."

"No!" Wendy called as he took the baby out. She called, "Jane!"

Tink hurry to stand next to her. She let the poor girl to cry on her shoulders and wrapped her hands around her. She whispered, "it's for the best. Trust me."

Outside, Pan was waiting. He looked at the little parasite in Felix's arms and frown. "How could this happened?"

Felix had no answer for that. The baby's little hand played with the lost boy's short.

Pan is disgust. Neverland was the home of boys, magic, and Wendy. There was no need for another girl in the island, surely not one so small and weaken. He took the bloody thing from Felix's hands.

His second asked him, "what are you going to do with her?"

Pan said, "the only thing I can do."

Than they disappeared.


	17. Where's Mom?

When Pan is back to the lost boys camp and refuse to mention Wendy, they all realize that she was gone. Tink promised them (quietly, so their leader wouldn't hear her speaking Wendy's name) that she is fine, and that there is no reason to worry. She went back to London, the beloved home she had dreamed on so often.

The lost boys are happy for her. While they all came from broken homes or didn't remember their home as clearly as they wished, it was clear to everyone that Wendy came from a good place. She used to cry daily that she wants to go back. No doubt, going back home is the best for her.  


This is what they first think.

Until they noticed something really odd: when Wendy was away, Peter Pan is changing. When Wendy was there (and before she came) he only needed a few days for himself when he wanted to calm down when he was in a temper. He used to act kindly to the lost boys and encourage them when they needed. He gave each one of them his attention. And he never, ever looked so serious and scary before.

Slightly says that it will go away eventually. Nibs isn't so sure about it. Felix is blindly loyal to Pan. And Rufio is gloomy. No one really wants to admit that when the bird is away there is something bad in the air. No one dare to say that something now is wrong.

Pan himself leaves the camp more often. No one knows where he is. Hours, days, weeks goes by and no one sees him. When he is in the camp everybody are silent so Pan won't burst on them.

They start thinking that maybe they should have let the mermaids drown her, or kill her themselves on her first day in Neverland. The motherly affection she had given them is not worth the pain they feel now.

They never say that to Pan though. Or how much they wish Wendy will be back.


	18. Her Only Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (Short friendly one shot between Tink and Wendy)

"So, tell me. What you think?"

Tink walked arround her. Yes, the new dress she gave Wendy was magnificent. Which should not be surprising, since Tink was a very stylist fairy. "Breath taking."

Wendy gloat. She gave the fairy a small bow and spin around, laughing. "You heard her pirates?" She called, "better not hope I'll show on your ship in the next battle, or I'll make some of you faint."

"She would!" Tink waved her hand up, as if to threat, and the two girls burst into laugh once more.

It was stupid, and they both knew it. It was just a dress that Tink had made of Wendy's old tore nightgown. True, the small amount of pixie dust Tink add made the dress look sparkly and lifted the skirt up in a fun way when she spin around. But it was just a cloth after all.

When their giggles stopped, Wendy touched the cloth of the fairy's own dress. She said, "you need to sew this part."

"I know."

"Would you like me to help you? It will be a thank you for this dress."

There was no way she would let anyone touch her dress. Let along to a human girl, their fingers were always too fat to make a proper cloth. "Sorry, I have this secret technic that I'm using..."

"Could you teach me? And than I can make clothes with you."

She opened her mouth to tell that this won't work for her when she saw the hope in Wendy's face. Her chest tight. Wendy could sew clothes good enough, like every mother would, but never will be as talented as Tink was. Still, she couldn't break her heart. "Sure. Maybe next week."

The other blond made a sound that made Tink shrink, and wrapped her hands around her. For the fairy it was slightly inconvenience, yet she said nothing. It was just Wendy's way. When she was happy, she was very, very much happy. When she wasn't... well, she was happy now, and that was what mattered.

Tink patted the back of her hair. Out there in the horizon she saw the sun starts to sink. She bitten the inner of her cheek. "It's night-time soon."

Wendy tensed. Tink would have been tense as well if she was in Wendy's shoes. "Than I should... go back to camp than."

Her hands were still wrapped around the fairy's figure, not wishing to let go. Perhaps she thought the fairy was like some sort of good luck charm. And Tink herself didn't really thrilled to let Wendy go. It was not fair that they didn't have more time together. If only she could have borrowed Wendy for a few days or so. The lost boys had lived for so long without a mother, they wouldn't care. Pan would, said a voice in her head.

She break free from Wendy's hug, unwillingly. "Well, that was..." she let her words die.

Wendy agreed. "Sure was."

"Alright. And hm... if you need anything..."

"Yeah! And hm... same."

They stood there for a few more seconds before the fairy took the first step back.

"Hey!"

Tink stopped, she turned back to Wendy with wonder in her eyes.

Wendy cleared her throat. "Well, it is such a long way back to camp and there are so many predators in the land. I'm scared I'll get hurt alone. Why won't you..."

The fairy stood next to her the second she finished the sentence. She grabbed Wendy's little hand and didn't let go all the way back to camp.


	19. The Names

There are names that Wendy never says out loud. Not when Pan is around. When she thinks about those names she press her lips tight and force herself to look away. He can't know.

She have learn how to act carefull when Pan was around. If Pan notice that she is angry or stressed, he might "suggest" that they would have a little chase. When he noticed that she even slightly upset on him, he pushed her back to the trees and far from the lost boys, and dragged her to unpleasant argument. Even a hint of any emotion can make him flip on her. So she force herself to smile more and speaks only in a calm and soft voice.

She can't keep the masks on all the time, though. Whenever it was daylight time, she could push aside all her thoughts and fears and play pretend like he so liked to. Yet all the best actors and actresses needs a break from time to time. And when the night fall down and she is all alone inside her treehouse or cage, her betrayal mind drift back to the boys she left.

John. Michael. Bae. The loyal boys who loved her more than any other. Not in their blood thirsty way or with greed. The boys who loved her because they were her family.

It hurts Wendy physically whenever she thinks about her brothers. If she is all alone, her hand clench on her dress and twists the cloth. And when Pan knows that something is hurting Wendy bird, he must fix it.

That's why she depressing any thoughts about her brothers. Who knows what Pan would do if he'll know about them? Her most positive theory is that he would bring them into this deadly island, where dreams often turned into nightmares. He'll turn them into lost boys, and since she knows her brothers all too well she knows that they would be scared and would hate it here.

Her worst theory is that Pan might kill them, so she would left no one to miss.

She keeps her mouth shut and let no one hear her fears. She can't let it slip. Pan can never know about it. And still when she goes to sleep she dreams about her loving family, on her parents, Nana, on bitter medicines and very big window.

She scared that the trees might tell Pan exactly what names she thinks about. So far he acted like she told him everything. Never asked her who was she thinking about and let her keep her thoughts private. This only made Wendy even more stress. She is dread from the day he'll hear those names.


	20. Things She Can’t Have #2

Sometimes, when Pan is actually smiles and happy, he gives her a new night gown. White like the clouds, at least for a day before the mud ruins it.

If he really is nice that day, he might even dust her with pixie- dust and they would fly above, both of them, alone. He never let go of her hand. He’ll try to make her laugh. She almost feels happy when he touch her.

And when he is more than that- not often, once or twice a year- he might actually dance with her above for the whole of Neverland to see. He would spin her around and he might play on his pipes, just to see her smilling again to him. Those days she might give him her secret kiss willingy. If only so they could pretand just a little longer.

That’s the closest she’ll ever get for a real wedding.


	21. The Other Boy

The second arrival of Wendy to Neverland is very different from the first time. She is quiet, she no longer tells stories unless Pan ordered her to, she is not as thrilled to play the mother part as she once did. No longer soft smiles. No longer thimbles. The bird is too sad now.

The only person who gets Wendy to smile in Neverland is Bae, whom she consider as her brother. Very often they disappear around the woods after dinner. They gossiped a lot about leaving this place. Bae gives Wendy false hope that there is always a way. Feeds her mind with all those stupid dreams she shouldn’t have.

Everyone, save those two, knows how much Pan hates it. Whenever he sees the bird whispering something into her favorite lost boy’s ear, his eyes turn dark. He falls again to one of his deadly mood and everyone arround him behave. No one mention that Wendy laughed again thanks to Bae. They all smart enough not to tell Pan that they think Wendy is in love with Bae.

Wendy gives Pan very little attention now when Bae is arround, and it’s only makes him angry even more. He swept her away from the camp, shows her the mermaids and the indians and all the other things that in her first visit he told her inappropriate for little girls. She is not as scared as he thought she’ll be, and she is only thrilled for a minute or so. Even when he let her join a battle against the pirates her attention drawn again to Bae safety. It was like there was nothing that could draw her from that boy.

Pan becomes more and more possessive. He fought to get her attention more than ever. He decided that if kindness isn’t helping, cruelty will. He force her to stay arround the camp while Bae been ordered to watch at the forest. Often he tells her she should fix the shirts of the lost boys and clean around, only so she’ll have no time to spent with Bae.

All those small punishes are not enough. It’s never enough. As hard as he tries, he no longer the center of Wendy’s world. Her heart focused now on someone else, and unworthy boy.

Everyone knows that it’s just a matter of time. One day Pan would run out of patience. He would send Wendy away from the camp and cut open the boy’s throat in front of the other boys as a warning. Pan was a boy, and boys not always likes to share. 

For now though, he is still just watching. Watching as the pair goes back into the woods, away from him.


	22. Reminder

He claims that every scar he gave her, was a reminder. The teeth mark on her shoulder was a reminder that she is a sweet person. The scratches on her back was reminder that she is a delicate person. The burning on right hand was a reminder for the fire in her soul. And the scar on her chest? That one he never explain.

Wendy never asked Pan why for him love came with scars. She knew he hated to talk about his past, and was constantly told not to provoke him. It was not just about her safety, it was also for the lost boys. And when it came to Pan there was always pain involved.

The first time someone noticed it, it was Tinkerbell. They sat under a rotten tree and Tink stroke back her hair when she saw the little cut behind her left ear. She narrowed her eyes. "What's that?"

Wendy knew she can't lie to her. She avoided her gaze when she said, "a reminder that he'll always listen to me, not matter what."

Tink looked at her with pity, which Wendy didn't liked. She spanned time with Tink so she wouldn't have to think on Pan or the lost boys. Quickly she mention something about a pretty bird that she saw in the forest and Tink left the subject.

The second time was when the last battle on the pirate ship was over. As the only girl, Pan turn Wendy as some sort of nurse for the lost boys. Her conscience never settle for that. She couldn't see anyone in pain. That's why after she rubbed remedy on the lost boys wounds she stayed on the ship to help the pirates that was still alive.

She barely spoken with Hook. They knew that they could never be friends. Not here. How did he noticed her that day? Did one of his pirates told him that Wendy Darling was shaking and gasped from time to time?

All that she knew was that when she was about to leave, the caption asked her to stay. He took her to his private cell and lifted her nightgown up. Wendy was tense until he pulled out his alcohol and started to rub it on her belly. From time to time the cloth he was using soaked with blood, and he had to wash it up. "Did one of my pirates cut you?"

"No."

"Don't be shy. This is not a way to treat a lady, I'll make sure to tell them..."

"It was... it's a reminder that I make everyone here feel warm in their guts."

Hook tsk on that. It was his only comment. She thanked him deeply for his help and got back to camp to make dinner for all.

Pan himself never seem worry about the scars he gave her. One time she mumbled that he'll kill her, he just shrugged and said that if she'll dare to die without his permission, he'll have to find a way to punish her.

She can't understand him. She asked herself daily if he got how pain he went her through. Was he able to feel pain himself? Seems like he didn't.

In his minds, those are just reminder for the things he told her he liked about her.

In her mind, this was a reminder to her that while he looked like a boy, he was a bloody demon.


	23. Study Meeting

Pan closed the book, loudly. He smashed it against the table, to get his study partner attention. Once he felt her eyes on him he raise up the book and threw it on the floor. “This is stupid!”

Wendy remain untouched by his not so settled outburst. She gotten used to those kind of beaver from him by now. “Now, is this kind of behave will help you to get through our literature test?”

“I don’t care! This book is stupid.”

Wendy reminded herself not to tell him how childish he is. He had already heard this lecture for over a thousand times from her, and it had never helped. She allowed him to mumble to himself how much it’s stupid, and who needs books anyway, and how he had better things to do in life before she said, “So you want me to leave? If I’ll call my brother now I might-”

She knew that he wouldn’t want her to leave. She was, after all, his last hope to improve his grades. What she didn’t expectad was the fear that caught his face or the quickly he grabbed her hand. “No, stay!”

“Peter! You’re hurting me!”

He let go of her hand fast, his eyes scanned her to make sure she didn’t want to leave.

Wendy thought it was weird about him. Than again, Pan was always a weird dude. No one really seemed to know what was he thinking about. Well, except for Tink and Felix. “Honestly now, you want to study or not?”

That torment look in his eyes told her that he didn’t, but when she closed her book he called, “Ok, Ok! I’ll study!”

“I need a five-minute break Pan. And I think you need as well.”

She thought she heard him sigh in relief. No doubt, he needed this break. He watched as she started to scroll on he phone. Oh, this writer that she liked published a new story online. A smile came to her face as she opened it. Ha, it was a fanfic on the book she and Pan just studied!

She started to read the first two lines, and felt her cheeks turn red. Wow, that was... there was not that much romance the original story. Well, she was not about to complain it. She bitten her lower lip. She sure didn’t mind to study for the test with those scenes in her mind.

“Why are you so red?”

She ignored Pan. A new hero caught her attention for the moment. The five minutes she set for her break were just over when she finished the third paragraph. Before she could go back to the study mood a thin hand grubbed her phone from her grasp.

She gasped, shocked from Pan’s nerve. “Peter! You are just awful!”

“Is this a summary for the book? Hold on...” A wicked smile spread on his face. “Wendy, you naughty girl.”

Her face heated up from shame now. “Give it back.”

"But this summary is so much better than Mrs. Blanchard summary!”

“It’s not funny!”

He was still laughing. Though he gave her back her phone, there was this horrible sparkle in his eyes. Wendy looked away, shameful that this spark made her guts twist in ah, so delicious way. “You have a hidden side in you, Darling. I like it.”

The poor girl buried her head in the book. “Please don’t mention it.” 

She thought she heard Pan licking his lips. The image of a hungry wolf came to her head. “You know what I like most about this story? The hero is brave and young, just like me.”

“He is arrogant like you, that’s for sure.”

“And the female heroine is sweet and kind. Just like you.”

She blinked. Her ears ring so hard, that Wendy wasn’t so sure she heard him right. She turn her head slowly to him. Pan looked at her intensively, almost hopeful. 

Ok, that was not expected. Pan was never a romantic person. When Fiona asked him out last year he mocked her in front of the entire school. Well, that bitch deserve it after mocking everyone else. And still.

Pan brushed a curl of her hair behind her ear. He whispered, “I don’t mind if you’ll imagine me as the hero, Wendy bird.”

She swallowed, and prayed that Pan didn’t heard her. “Can I?”

“I’ll encourage it even.”

She pulled away from him, not breaking eye contact. “It sure will make reading more pleasant.”

His eyes fell on her lips. Now she was sure she didn’t imagine it. “If it will, who am I to argue.”

“But you know? In the book they don’t end up together.”

Pan was so close to her now. She could smell him. He always had this smell of forest and teen spirit, and something else that could be described only as Peter Pan. “Who?”

“The charactes from the story.”

“Really? Such a shame.”

So close. If they’ll be quiet even a second more, he’ll hear the pounds of her heart. She thought she was about to explode. She cleared her throat. “Yes, she leaves him and give birth a girl.”

He put his hand on her shoulder. A welcoming hit fills her veins. He smiles to her, and against all odds when it came to him, she actually felt safe. 

Pan whisper, “Well, there is always the fanfics.”

And than they kissed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any requests/prompts/ects please let me know!


	24. Happy Birthday!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Published on my birthday

Happy birthday Wendy Darling. 130, big girl, ain’t you now? So pretty in your nightgown, with the flowers in your hair and pixie dust surrounded you. You the center of attention, the most important girl in island today.

Aren’t you exciting, little mama? All your lost boys are arround you. All singing and dancing, cheer, praise you make you laugh. They had sworn to make you happy, not matter how long it take. Like the loyal children they are, they give you flowers gifts and kisses. 

No one mention why this day is so important, this is one of the laws of Neverland. No one mention that all the flowers blooming just for you, just to make you happier. Or why the fairies dance so close to you. Or that the mermaids shows up on the shore and seems actually friendly today. They all pretend that this is just extremely happy day, and play that you are the most happy.

Pan himself is behaving, just for you. He play his pipes and acts kindly to all, offers you to give you another tour around the place. As if you don’t know every inch on this land. He likes to pretend that today you are his trophy queen, and that no one can break you two apart.

Are you happy, little bird? Look at all your friends and family around you. All the people in Neverland adores you, they want you to enjoy from your day.

Why are you crying, little Wendy? Is it because you feel too old to stay in this paradise? Or is it because Pan refuse anyone to tell it is your birthday? Maybe it’s because there is no real cake? although, the fairies dances are quite nice. Such a sadness, how unfortunate.

Push your tears away, Neverland’s queen. This is not a day for sadness. It’s a jolly day, your day to smile. There will be no cages or pain today, or death of anyone. Are you happy at last, Wendy? Can you at least pretend you are?


	25. The Evolution of the Lost Boys

The First Kind of Lost Boys  
We are all lost boys, running along the jungles of Neverland. We all came to this island of endless possibilities and left a world where we were not wanted or loved.Our hair runs free in the wind, a crossbow is always in our hands. We dream at nights on monsters and in the daylight we are fighting them.

Peter Pan is our leader. We love and respect Peter Pan. Whatever he’ll tell us we’ll do, without consider first if it’s good to us or not. Pan always comes up with the most amazing plans. He thinks on the best games to play, and we all adore him. Everyone knows that this island belong to Pan, and that he knows best what to do.

We only harm animals and monsters that have hurt us. Neverland and all it’s resident our friends, so we won’t kill anyone unless it harm us first. We fight the pirates, yet we never hurt them too hard. We dance with the fairies and swim with the friendly mermaids. We are all safe in Neverland. 

There is only one girl in Neverland, and that is our mother: Wendy. She fix our clothes and tackle us to sleep, and all those other things mothers should do. Some of us are taller than her. Some of us are even older than her. We love her deeply, and if anyone would try to hurt our mother we will be mad.

We are the lost boys, and all we want to do is to play games. We live for fun, and coming to Neverland is the best thing that has ever happen to me.

The second Kind of Lost Boys  
We are all lost boys, a miserable soul that had found their way back to the island of the devil. We came here because we had been that this is the land of dreams, and when we came we found out that those are actually nightmares. In our old world we were not wanted by our parents. We’re not wanted in this world either, yet we are surrounded by others like us. How can it be that we are still lonely?

There is always dirt on our face and ash on my clothes. No one is there to tell us how we should behave. No one cares about the rules here. We gets hurt here all the time. Some of us die here all the time. We scared of the darkness, bad things happen in the dark.

Peter Pan is our leader. He can cut our throat open and we wouldn't fight back. No one allowed to hurt Pan. We know that most of the nightmares in this place are his, and he can imagine something really bad if we are not carefull. We have to stay loyal to Pan if we want to service.

Neverland itself is magical, unfortunately. There is blood hungry pirates everywhere, or mermaids that would drown you if you are not carefull enough. We surrounded by enemies all the time, if we won't watch our steps we might die.

There are no parents in Neverland. There are no girls in Neverland. There are no hugs in Neverland.

We are the victims in this place.

The Third Kind of Lost Boys  
We are all lost boys, and you will never hear my steps when I'm running. Neverland is my home, and I never had anywhere else to live in. My claws are pointy and my teeth are sharp. I don't need a dagger so you'll fear me. I no longer dream.

Peter Pan is our leader. He watch us as if we were little animals and rewards us if we make a good kill. He doesn't care so much about us. And as much as we want to impress him, he gives us only the slightest attention. In some place in the back of our mind we know that we will never get his love, yet we keep trying.

All the people in Neverland are afraid of us. We are the most awful power in the island. Mermaids and fairies runs away when we near, and the pirates pray that we will never get into fight with them.

There is only one girl in Neverland, and she belongs to Pan. We call her mother because we can’t show her any other form of affection. Our leader let’s us push her arround the camp and tease her, but we must keep ourself from making her cry. If she cries, Pan is angry at us. Only he can make her cry or bleed. 

We feel nothing. Not a real fear, not adore, not happy. We are only a shadows of what we once were.

We are not loved in our home world. We are not loved in Neverland. We are useless, replaceable, and should have never been born.

We are the lost boys. And you better run from us.


	26. All that He Wants...

He had always been a greedy boy, took what he wanted. He never cared who it belonged to, or if anyone would fight him against it. Consequences was such a grown up thing to worry about. And it was all just for fun.

Whenever someone think of a new game, he declare it his idea. They gather in groups and starts to play. No one never bits him. He changes the rules when they gets more points. Or guts them.

Who can tell him no? He was the leader, the king. No was a word that adults most used. There are no adults in Neverland. And the only rule was what Pan wanted.

There is this hunger inside him, burning and wants so much more. When stuff grow old on him, he throws them away. He likes new stuff. He can’t get enough of them. He wants more, and more, and more.

Wendy can’t give him more than she had already gave him. She gave him her trust, her secret kiss, her freedom, her heart. How much more Wendy Darling can give?

He thinks there is something else, something that she is hiding from him. He knew it because she didn’t bored him yet. If he had all of her, he would have dropped her and goes to the next exciting thing. So why all that he wants still is Wendy?


	27. Kissing Him

There is nothing wrong with kisses, right? At least that was what Wendy Darling thought when she had first landed in Neverland. When she had been given the role of the mother to play, she took care of the lost boys as much as she could. She tucked them to sleep, she encouraged them to go hunting, and clapped her hands proudly when they wanted to show off to her.  
So when Curly got a scratch from an arrow and bleed, she thought that kissing it better would be the best thing to do. The young girl kneeled down, pressed her precious lips to the wound, and promised him that it will be better. It all be better.

Thinking backwards, she maybe shouldn’t have done this in front of the others. When they saw how gentle Wendy was when you got hurt, their mind related it to pain. They all (save Felix and their leader) started to get hurt more often when she was arround. There was almost no day that there were no five or six wounded last boys who came to her bleeding. “Mom, I need you to kiss it better!”

Wendy was an innocent girl, so it took her a long time to understand that they have done this on purpose. It was probably two years since she had come to Neverland before the thought crossed her mind. She had gathered all the lost boys around and said, “from this day forward, when you want a kiss, you just need to tell me.”

She thought that the older boys would be ashamed to admit that they want a kiss from her and stop. Once again she forgot that the lost boys were nothing like the boys she knew from home. From six kisses on a day, they have started to ask her each a kiss every hour. Her lips got to know all too well their foreheads, their hands, their cheeks.

The bigger problem was not even that the lost boys had wanted more of her attantion. The bigger problem was that now when she have declared that asking for a kiss from her was not a Weakness, there was another boy who asked her to kiss him.

Of course, Pan never told her to kiss him next to the other boys. Weakness or not, he didn’t wanted them to see him asking for anything. And even when they were alone, he never “asked” her for a kiss. Those sort of things were beneath him. instead he looked her in the eyes and told her, “Kiss me.”

That made Wendy really nervous. Pan was her biggest nightmares. He was the deadliest boy on the island, and nobody dared to touch him. It was one of those few rules on the island: never ever touch Peter Pan. And he actually wanted her to kiss him.

“What are you waiting for?”

“Hm...”

“Kiss me.”

“Ah... Where...?”

He pointed on his right cheek, and that made her even more nervous.

He started to show signs of anger. “What’s wrong bird? You want another night in the cage?”

The last thing she needed was another tantrum from Pan. With her eyes closed she lied forward and pressed her lips for less than a second to his flesh.

The feeling was weird. It was not like kissing anyone from the lost boys. It made her guts warm and cold in the same time, and even when she farther her lips from his cheek she could feel him on her lips. She thought he would be anger with her for giving him such a short kiss, but when she opened her eyes she saw that his eyes were wide and not at all focused, and that his mouth was open and dry. She used his confusion to run back to the camp.

Very often it became this sort of routine. He waited for her to leave the camp for a shower, or popped in her treehouse without warning. Than he would have told her to kiss him. The places he wanted her to kiss him was very different from the places that she had kissed the lost boys. No one had ever asked her to kiss them on their crook of their neck, or on the center of their shoulder blades.

Every kiss made her feel weird. Part of her was warm and hot- ater all, Pan really was a pretty boy- but there was another part of her that felt disgusted. Pan was a serial killer, a monster who kidnapped her. And no matter how much she had told herself it was just a motherly kiss it made her feel bare.

One day he pointed on his lips, and Wendy got tensed. It was the first time he had asked her to kiss him there. She had never kissed a boy on his lips. She been told that she should never kiss a boy on his lips, more so when they were alone. There was no use though to explain on of those “grown up rules” to Pan.

When she kissed him, something in her chest tight. She wanted to pull back and run but he put his hand on the back of her head. They were both freezing for a few seconds before Pan opened just a little his mouth. She felt his tongue licking her lower lip before he used his other hand to grasp her chin and to force her open her jaw.

There was a big difference between his lips and his hands. While his hands were forceful and possessives, his mouth was shy and gentle. His tongue touched hers very lightly, and his lips didn’t sucked her in. She knew, as much as she tried not to think about it, that it was clearly his first kiss as well.

When they finally parted, Pan was not confused. He looked at her hungrily, and she scared he would demanded her to kiss him again. Lucky her, it seemed like for now he seemed pleased. When he walked past her back to the camp, he didn’t even glanced back at her.

From this day on, the lost boys didn’t asked her for a kiss again. She couldn’t have proven it was Pan’s doing, she just had a feeling he did. Not even when they bleed they came to her anymore, and there was something new in Felix eyes when he looked at her now.

Wendy told herself that it was not that bad. So Pan had asked her to kiss him more now, so what? It’s just a kiss. Nothing more. Well, his lips become more forceful, and he often pressed her hard against trees when they kissed. That’s it. Oh, and his hands became more and more liberate now. That’s it.

No matter what she had told herself, she couldn’t lie. She feared Pan now more than ever. Pan became more and more hungry every time they kissed, and she had become more and more tense when she saw him. She was no longer worried from kissing him. She was now terrified of the day kissing would no longer be enough for him.

Sometimes she wonder what she’ll feel when the “more” would come.


	28. Kissing Her

I’ve been asked to continue my one shot “Kissing Him”. But I’m dry out of ideas and it’s tests time in my collage, so I just wrote Pan;s pov. Hope you liked!

Peter Pan hated other people's touch. If a lost boy was reckless enough to brush his hand on his leader's back, even if he didn't ment it, Pan's eyes would have turned black and he would have been attack the unfortunate boy. The others would have been laugh nervously and naturally walked away from him. From his point of view, there was nothing wrong with teaching his friends this violent lesson: boys learned better to stay away if they feared.

When Wendy Darling came to Neverland, he pushed her away like he did to the others. Mother or not, the demonic boy wouldn't let clean up his bleeding cuts. It didn't matter to him that her skin seemed really soft or that her hair always smelled like warm summer. It didn't matter to him that the lost boys seemed to adore her.

He believed that he'll never let her touch him, until the day that he had seen her kissing Curly's head. An unfamiliar emotion filled him inside. Kings had no reason to feel envy. So why he had longed Wendy to press her soft lips against his temple?

He believed this emotion would be gone as quickly as it came, as long as he wouldn't see the maternal girl kissing another. Alas, she couldn't keep her lips to herself. There was a part inside him that claim that she had done this on purpose. She must have known about the storm that awoken in his chest when she had seen pressing her mouth on the lost boys cuts and wounds, Otherwise, why else she kissed them so often?

He tried to convince himself that he didn't care, that Wendy can kiss whoever she wants. His wrists still clenched into fists when he saw her showing any affection towards his friends.

Wendy declared that if they want her to kiss them they should just say so, he knew she did this on purpose. What kind of girl let a group of savage boys permission to ask her to kiss them as they liked? She liked kissing the boys, he believed it thervenly. In other live he learned that there was a harsh word to those kind of girls.

Pan was determinate that he shall never ask her for a kiss. Too bad that with ever day that passed this determination melted down. The other boys loved her touch, and somehow he knew that he'll like her touch as well.

Even after Pan had admitted himself that he would like a kiss from Wendy Darling, he knew he wouldn't let the other boys to see them kissing. He took her to an isolated spot on the island where he knew they where free from snooping eyes. All that he wanted was only one kiss. It hurt him that Wendy looked so shaken when he pointed on his cheek and he thought bitterly, You didn't mind when it was any other boy,

He was still angry when she lower her mouth to the right side of his mouth. Pan even thought he should push her to the ground until he felt her lips against his flesh. For one second the world stopped and Pan's dark heart skipped a beat. Suddenly he knew why the lost boys wanted her to kiss them all the time. Her lips was so warm and felt really good against his skin. It felt better than even to kill a pirate.

He couldn't grab the fact that Wendy left until she was back at camp. Why would she leave him like this? She loved to kiss the other boys, and always stayed around after she kissed them. He wonder what was it that pushed Wendy away. He pushed out the little voice that told him that she run from him because she hated to kiss him, that kissing him was nothing like kissing any other boy in Neverland.

He didn't mind if Wendy liked it or not, because this feeling was too good to live without it now. Every time he could have had her now, he took. Every so often he thought about new places she should kiss him. Places he saw grown ups kiss when he lived in another world. More and more he wanted those lips.

Felix noticed that there was something about them, and his second in commands didn't like it. One night when they celebrated arround the camp he told Pan, "now she'll know how to get herself out of troubles."

Pan replay, "She can't. No one is above my laws."

He didn't tell Felix that he watched her carefully now, that there was a part in him that wanted to punish Wendy harshly. He had no idea yet how. Still, he knew it would be involved touching and waited for it.

But Wendy was so good, so pure. She was never wrong, and her soft lips kept him calm and happy all the time. He had two parts in him now. One part enjoyed her gentle touch and the bond they shared. The other part in him felt that it was not enough. It couldn't be enough. A need for something new awoken in him, something he didn't knew exactly what was.

Than one day he knew.

When he told her to kiss him on his lips, he felt her hesitation. Of course she had hesitate. It was all fun and games until that moment, and even Pan himself was not so sure why he wanted her to kiss him there. He just knew that he needed her to kiss him there. He wanted to tell her that it was a big step in his mind as well, that no girl had ever kissed him there.

Kissing Wendy Darling on her lips was nothing like get a kiss from her in any other place. She was still as a statue and froze when he touched her, and yet it was better than anything he had ever experiment. She needed some help to open up for him. He used his hands to show her what she needed to do. Even like that it was magical. He wanted to swallow her up.

When the kiss broke he saw the red color on her cheeks. How charming the color was on her. Blushing and gasping she was amazing. And all his. A new realization came to Pan: he couldn't share her anymore. He shouldn't. He flew back to the camp and sworn in front of the others that if any one of them would dare to even think about Wendy's lips again, he would throttle them himself.

He had Wendy darling all to himself, and Pan discovered that he liked it when she touched him. He wanted to encourage her to touch him more, to explore his body. He used his kisses to tell her that it's ok, that she allowed to act curious with him. Sadly she was not as brave to explore like he was, and he needed to act more and more bold with his hints. She'll gets there, he knew she would. All that Wendy needed was more convincing.

Wendy was a shy little girl, and she was gentler than he was in her kisses. Maybe if he'll be more bold, she'll understand that he wanted her act bold with him. He didn't care to give her more clues act bold. It didn't matter to him that everyone probably knew by now what he felt for Wendy. Kissing her felt better than anything.

He could never get tired from Wendy Darling.


	29. Her Only Friend #2

(This one shot had been requested on tumblr. If you have any requests for part two of any of my previous one shots/ any prompt, please let me know here or on tumblr)

“Ready, set, attack!”

Wendy swinged up her sword while laugh. She wasn’t strang enough to hold it as stable as her rival, and from time to time her sword slipped down. The girl in front of her used the back of her sword to slap her on her arms and cuts, and every touch made Wendy darling laugh harder.

Finally, the sword she held slept down from her grab. Wendy couldn’t stopp laughing as her “enemy” aimed the sword to her temple. “Sorunder!”

“Never!” Wendy called. Before the other blond could see it coming Wendy took half step to her right, before throwing herself front. The surprise attack worked. Tinkerbell lost her balance, dropped her sword and the two girls rolled down on the grass. 

When they stopped rolling they looked at each other, and laughed harder. The pirates could probably hear them from the shore. Perhaps they asked themselves what was wrong with those two. 

Tink’s hair fell on her face. Wendy used to fingers to push it back. She smiled. “It’s much more fun to fight against you than with boys.”

Tink’s smile didn’t fell, yet her eyes cold. “Why?”

Wendy knew she was thinking about the lost boys. And honestly, she had a point. Fighting against the lost boys was less a game and more a battle. Lost boys hated to lose. They would fight against you until you’ll bleed to death.

Pan never allowed her to fight against them. One time she offered one of the new boys to fight with her and cut her accidentally on her arm. She tried to hide it, and failed. She could still remember his screams.

“When my brothers and I fought it was always like... they always been tought that you should never hit a girl, that I’m weak and can’t defend myself. So they always let me win.”

Tink blinked. “Your brothers, sure. Wow, that’s...”

“Boring.” She pulled herself up and lowered her hand for Tink. “At some point I told them that I would no longer tell them stories until I’ll lose.”

“You kidding me!”

Wendy nod. “Than I did lost, but it was obvious they faked half the battle.”

Tink snored. She, of course, couldn’t remeber a game when she wanted to lose. Wendy could never tell her that the dual with her, the fights where Tink never played fair with her yet didn’t hurt her, was the best part of her day. She could never tell her that while she came to her to learn from the fairy how to protect herself, she didn’t wanted to win.

Because winning meant she had learned. Learning means that Felix would make sure their time together would stop. And Wendy didn’t want to stop seeing Tinkerbell- she wanted to always keep playing with her.

As Tink took her sword of the ground and hand Wendy her's she said, “Well, I’m proud to say that you have lost fair and squire.”

Wendy took a bow. She pushed aside the bad thoughts. “I’d be honored!”

“Ready to lose again?”


	30. Thousand Hits

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’ve got one thousand hits on this one shot collection. I thought Thousand Hits sounds like a really good title, I should do something with that. I’m writting those fanfics primarily because it’s helping me dealing with my stress durning college, but I’m very grateful to all those who read and keeps reading those one shots here and on tumblr. I also wants to thank to MischiefHowl, Vanillathumb, Demon_Bloods, Gamergal101, Moonlight1803, KuroiYuki, and Lily04 as well as the other 39 guests left kudos on this work! You are all wonderful people!

Her body lay helplessly on the wet dirt. It was everything against what her mother tought her about good female behave. Good girls never lay on the ground. Good girls never let their clothes to get dirty.

But Wendy also been tought that the man is the head of the family, and you can’t move without approval of him.

How long would she stay there? Maybe one of the lost boys would find her and would force her to stand up and get back to camp, again. Or maybe Tinkerbell would find her in this place and would take her to her treehouse to sleep.

She didn’t wanted to move on her own. The stormy wind, the frozen trees all told her that Pan was still angry at her. It wasn’t out of the ordinary. The boy had such a temper mood that it’s enough just to say a word to trigger him. She learned back in her first days in Neverland that it’s best not to insult him back, and granted her teeth in exchanged.

Lately he was very annoyed, not specifically on her: he broke Slightly knuckle because he walked too much, he almost broke Tootels’s nose because he breathed too loudly, and almost poked out Felix’s eye. His own shadow was missing, and that was a bad sign as well.

The first time he hit her, Wendy was shocked. She was so used to the soft touch of her parents that when he pushed her against the tree so harsh that she could hear rings in her ears, she screamed. The fact that she was so scared made him furies, and he gave her a second hit. The third and the fourth followed. He only stopped after ten.

The eleventh time came three days later, when he noticed that she looked at the sea with a smile. Felix told her once in a rare moment of honesty between them that he thought she looked at the pirate’s ship. Pan hated that when he thought she wanted to play with the pirates.

Twelve to twenty five came because she wanted to go home. Twenty six to thirty were because she was kind to a lost boy who was not Pan.

No one had ever asked her, so she never told that she could remember every time that she got hit.

Is it normal that I feel this cold after thousand hits? She asked herself. She used to cry when he done it in the other times. Now she had no tears in her.

Pan never liked to ask her forgiveness. When the storm on the isle would pass she’ll know that he calmed down. He’ll find her wherever she she’ll hide from him, would tell a joke or ask her to play with him. He would not address to the fact that she had blue and purple marks all over her body. He would ignore her shaken body. Pan would treat her again as the most beloved girl in Neverland.

Wendy wonder if he ever counted his hits like she did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you or anyone around you is suffer from violent, you are not alone. Wherever you are in the world there are organizations that works around the clock to help women and children in danger. Call or contact with them online, and save your or those around you lives!


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, I've finished my tests for this semester. Those sort of fanfics and oneshots are my cool-down after the study marthone.  
> Big thanks to Hana_Shiyuki and the other five new guests who left kudos from last time, and to Vanillathumb and Fullsun_uwu for their kind commants! While I wasn't able to publish new fanfics, I'm still touched by your soppurt in this work!

Felix knew more than they had thought.

Well, everyone knew that Felix knew a lot about Neverland's secrets, but as the second in comand they thought he still knew less than Peter Pan himself. That mistake wasn't born out of contempt or derision, it was because everyone asumed (rightfully) that there was never a smarter, a more talented, or more capeable boy than the leader of the lost boys. Even Slightly, who was one smarter boys on the island, had no idea how much Felix knew.

It true that Felix was nothing compare to Pan himself. However, Felix had one quility that Pan didn't had (don't tell Pan I've said that!): Felix cared. He cared for his friends, he cared that the pirates knew where not to stick their noses, he cared for the blond fiary that mostly stayed on her part on the other side of the island.

And yes, more than anything else he cared for Pan. To make sure that there were no secrets on the island that harmed him.

So he kept on eveyones secrets as much as he could. The last thing that Pan wanted to know was that some lost boy had any second thought about neverland, about finding his way back home. He convinced the boys who was weak and needed a little "push" that they should stay here, and pushed aside any disloyel thoughts from their mind. Loyalty for Pan would garrenty happines. For all of them.

Only when their thoughts had threaten to harm the balance... well, it wasn't a snitch if he told it for the greater good.

He didn't had to snitch really often, luckly.

Pan knew that Felix was smart, and in some place deep in his mind Felix asumed that Pan knew he didn't told him all the secrets. He probably knew, as well as his second in comand, that he only hid information so he wouldn't ruin the fun. Nobody wants to ruin the game.

Felix knew that sooner or later he would have to tell Pan all the secrets that he could not "fix". He could tell Pan all the secrets if he needed, exept for two.

The first one was the scariest secret. The secret of Pan himself. Oh, his leader must have thought that he had no idea, but he knew. He knew better than anyone else the signs on Pan's face. He knew that Pan's features soften around her. He saw how he came to visit her when she was asleep, how he kept quiet and stare at her often. How he played often his papes even though she couldn't hear his music because the energy that filled the air when he played calmed Wendy Darling.

No, he could never tell his leader that he was in love with Wendy. Such a thing would be a grown up thing, and who knows how Pan would deal with his fourstration that he had done something mature? Pan might hurt Wendy or himself, all in the sake of getting rid of those emotions.

The seccond, and not less important secret that he wouldn't tell, was how well Felix understood him. He felt his fists tight whenever he reminded himself that he should get rid of those harmfull emotions. He knew, all too well, what it meant to be in love. Espiclly with someone who could never love you back fully. He kept reminding himself that if Pan would ever find out what he felt, Pan would cut his throat without hissetatione. Neverland was his home, but Felix couldn't stay if he had thought about something like love.

Felix knew all the secrets. Most of them he hid to keep the peace, but if Pan wanted to he would scream it out loud from the highest cliff he could reach.

Except for two secrets, that he had to hide. No matter how much Pan would want to know.


End file.
